birthday 1.5

The end of the year is always busy at our house. Starting in October with my husband’s birthday and going until New Year’s. It has gotten a smidgen better since my girls have both reached an age where I no longer have to purchase or construct Halloween costumes, there are no more class parties to attend, and now that My oldest is a tsophmore in college, I am down to conferences and the like for one. That being said, my daughters are both November babies. In fact, their birthday are two weeks to the day apart. With that I will get to the point of this post. When is hosting an actual birthday party for your child not a parent’s responsiblity anymore?

Upon sitting down to do research on the subject, I could only find opinion pages and articles, which is fine, I didn’t really expect much more than that. My posts are only meant to express my opinions and views and You the reader decide what is best for you and yours.

When my girls were very young we invited all the family on the weekend between their birthdays. It was a neutral weekend and some members of our family live a few hours away. This was so they only had to come down once. Then the party with friends would be scheduled from 2-4pm the same day. I would make these elaborate cakes for each one, depending on what they were into at the time. There were goodie bags and themed plates and napkins, and sometimes even a pinata. It was definite party. All that changed when my oldest started middle school and again when she reached high school. It also changed again when my youngest started middle school and is now in high school and I see changes coming again.

Through those changes, I have seen a few different things.

– Middle school (age 11) I noticed it became more about having a few friends over and doing a specific thing such as skating, movies, etc. I still had to be in charge of getting everyone gathered and to the activity of  choice, make a cake, and plan dinner for a group of girls which usually meant ording pizza.

-High School (age 14) I noticed this is when I was cut out and the friends begin to plan birthdy activities and do the driving. I may or may not to figure out what to feed them but I still made a cake to celebrate at home with family around the plans. Fourteen was the exception to this for my oldest. We did plan and execute a surprise party for her. Sixteen was we made a big deal out of but no party. We decorated the morning of before waking her and chaulked her car windows. Eighteen she had other plans and she recently turned twenty and again no party. My youngest doesn’t show any interest in having a party any longer. For her fourteenth, I planned and printed an itinerary and made us a few spa-like appointments and spent they whole day celebrating and then she had friends over. She just turned fifiteen and again nothing major. She’s pretty low key.

To summarize, it is my opinion that the answer to the question “When When is hosting an actual birthday party for your child not a parent’s responsiblity anymore?” is when your kid(s) tell you. You can see their interests change and they will let you know in one way or another that a big to-do is no longer what they want.

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